You have legitimate concerns about trying to work out a settlement on your own, based simply on what you and your spouse are able to figure out about the issues to be covered. What if you leave something out? How well will your agreement work in practice and detail a year from now?
On the other hand, should you really take yourself out of direct decision making here?
Each marriage is unique. Husbands and wives often tell me that their special needs and concerns can get lost in litigation. Are you spending money to set yourself up for a trial? Here in Michigan, only 1.3% of all cases are “decided by the court.”
If your case merits this vigorous sort of battle, then I won’t try to change your mind.
But if you aren’t honestly looking for an adversarial process, recognize that it can take years to heal the damaging emotional and financial fall-out from pre-trial interactions. I see it all the time in my practice.
Mediation was designed to be completely voluntary
It’s also a non-binding process.
So you can try it out, and if for any reason either of you wants to stop, it stops. Not only are you not held to any tentative agreements you may have been working on up to that point in process, but the courts are generally pretty reluctant to get involved with any of what has happened in your mediation attempts.
Mediation in the State of Michigan has been set up this way in order to to encourage you to try this proven and effective form of alternative dispute resolution.
What’s the process like?
I work only for the two of you, as opposed to working for one of you or the other.
As the mediator for you both as a couple, I’m here to facilitate discussion, maintain solutions-oriented interaction, and help you generate positive options. It’s not uncommon for one person to have more experience in this area or that, and thus maybe have a bit of a forceful impulse there.
Part of my job is to even out those things, to ensure you’re both fully engaged and comfortable with the process leading up to any agreement coming out of this process.
Typically the two of you will meet with me in the same room, and you may have your attorneys sit in if you’d like (my clients also sometimes simply have them available by phone, to be called only if questions ore concerns arise). Alternatively, I can meet with each of you separately, if you prefer.
The two of you will set your own agenda within the approach we have here.
Michigan Divorce Negotiation can help you work out all sorts of agreements
For some of you, that may mean pre-separation items; for others, it’s just one or two sticking-point issues.
I work on comprehensive divorce agreements, which you can then take to your mediation-friendly lawyer for drafting into a Judgment of Divorce for the court. I also do post-judgment work, typically around parenting time and family business issues.
In addition to the Posts I’ve shared on this Blog and elsewhere, further background is provided on my About Page. LINK
Please let me know if I can be of assistance. My professional practice can be reached through the Contact tab above.