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Category Archives: Communication
The little things that compromise relationships, part 2
Implicit in part 1 of this topic was the notion that men and women each have a list of irritants that can cumulatively compromise their relationships. Here are the top five complaints about men. “Snoring” “Developing a new hobby, buying all the equipment, and then moving on to something else.” “Not listening” “Untidiness” “Spending too [...]
Posted in Communication, Relationships
Tagged as: irritants, Psychologies, relationship issues, roommate issues, sources of conflict
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The little things that compromise relationships, part 1
“Typically, we think of relationship deal breakers as the big dramas,” writes Rebecca Smith in the August issue of Psychologies. In her article titled, “I love you, but…,” she delineates examples of what we’re often told are brand-name causes of divorce, including “infidelity, addiction and disagreements over big decisions such as whether or not to [...]
Posted in Blind Spots, Communication, Prenuptials, Relationships
Tagged as: divorce causes, Michael Cunningham, Psychologies, roommate, Trevor Silvester
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Game-playing in divorce negotiation: “The Wince”
This tactic plays on two fronts uniquely available to the other side in divorce negotiations. Many individuals in the process of divorce are insecure: About their decision-making, the reasonableness of the needs they perceive themselves to have, and their ability to self-advocate outside of marital partnership. Folks going through divorce have a high need for [...]
Game-playing in divorce negotiation: “Passive-Aggressive”
This, and what Bullies, Tyrants, and Impossible People labels “Silence,” exploits what almost seems to defy human nature in a lot of folks. If you’re a “rescuer” or “care-taker,” then moments of seeming non-progress in divorce negotiations will likely cause you to feel compelled to rush in with options, proposed solutions, and even adjustments to [...]
Posted in Communication, Control, Emotions, Negotiation, Unhooking
Tagged as: Bullies Tyrants and Impossible People, coercive tactics, control, divorce mediation, game theory
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Advocacy evidence is ultimately self-compromising
“I have seen advocacy evidence introduced in … divorce and child custody cases,” writes Richard J. Gelles, Ph.D., Dean of the School of Social Policy & Practice at the University of Pennsylvania. I cringe every time I hear this, as I know it compromises the ability of the finder of fact to actually find the [...]
Posted in Communication, Conflict, Legal Matters, Parenting / Co-Parenting
Tagged as: divorce research, domestic violence, Duluth Model, intimate partner violence, ipv
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